Good Table Manners: Who Cares? By Judy Edmond, Urban Regional Extension Agent, Madison County

Today, it seems that society has strayed from the courtesies that show we are caring human beings. Good manners are not just rules of etiquette, but also involve socially acceptable behavior. Etiquette is rules of behavior that can be memorized, and they are an expression of how you treat others when you care about their feelings.

Good manners create a sense of poise and grace. Knowing the how, what, where, when, and why of social graces can give us a sense of security. In other words, manners are not just tools for social success or special activities. They incorporate behavior that should be practiced in our daily lives until they become routine. For example, good table manners instill confidence and if dining with a potential boss, could be a factor in obtaining the job you desire.

Here are some general rules and manners to remember when dining out.

• Place your napkin on your lap as soon as everyone is seated. If the napkin is large, fold and place the open edge facing you.
• Utensils are used from the outside in, and any utensils above your plate are for dessert.
• Food is passed or served by the person at the head of the table. Food is passed in a counterclockwise movement around the table. Solid foods go on your left and liquids go on your right.
• Do not reach across someone to get what you like. Ask the person nearest the item to "please" pass it to you, and say "thank you" after you receive it.
• When serving yourself, take modest portions of food.
• Adding sauces and spices to food can be ill-mannered.
• Cut your meat one piece at a time (no more than three).
• Eat quietly with your mouth closed.
• Don't eat too fast. Don't wash your food down.
• Use your utensils properly and don't stab your food. Rest your knife on the rim of the plate while you are eating.
• Wipe your fingers and mouth often with your napkin.
• At the close of the meal, make sure your napkin stays on your lap until everyone has finished eating and drinking. At that point, place the napkin to the right of the place setting. Never wad the napkin and place it on the table.

Visit http://www.aces.edu for more information on social manners.

gourmet-food-revolution.com. (n.d.). Basic essentials of dinner table etiquette. Retrieved October 2, 2009.

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