EXTENSION REPORT

Replacing Stress with Peace

Have you ever had a day when everything went wrong? Bad days make it hard to be patient and loving or to be a good parent or spouse. Make a personal plan to replace the stress in your life with peace so that you can become a more effective parent a more peaceful person.

Think of the things that make you feel stressed, such as the lack of money, whining or nagging children, loneliness. Having a list may be useful as you try to deal with these stressors in your life.

What does stress do to you? It can build up and result in anger, headaches, depression, and feelings of helplessness, self-hate and other terrible feelings. How can you deal with stress?

Think about the things you love to do. List twenty things you love to do, take a walk, exercise, play with the children, sing, and dance. Take time in your life to do the things you love. Filling your life with things you love is the first step towards dealing with stress.

Recognize the things that bother you and know the signs so that you don’t get caught in the trap of trying to fix the world. You can not fix the world, but there are things you can do that will help to make a difference. Show respect for your own feelings. Realize that you may not be able to fix everything at once. Some things are beyond our control and we can not change them. Instead deal with each stressor one at a time. Instead of dwelling on a hurt or injustice.

Let them go, decide which stressors you can not change. When you feel no one cares, accept what has happened and live in the present. Unhappy childhood memories can not be changed, so forgive and live in the present.

Take a mental vacation from stress. Find a place where you can be alone, lie down, close your eyes, and imagine lying on a beautiful beach with the sun on your face. Feel the warm sand, breathe deeply and slowly. Or listen to soothing music like the ocean or symphony. When you feel better, open your eyes and think of some small thing you can do to make things run more smoothly.

Use your sense of humor. Make light of certain situations, get the children involved.  Be careful and avoid sarcasm and hurtful words that may cause others harm and cause them to be stressed out too.

.           Keep yourself strong by eating well, getting enough rest or sleep. Exercise regularly and relaxation can relieve a lot of stress. Take the time to take care of yourself. Take advantage of offers from friends to give you a break or a brief respite from the children and chores.

Draw strength from family and friends by talking to help you make decisions, feel loved and feel hopeful. You may have family or friends that add to your stress so it may be a good idea not to talk to them when you are already feeling stressed. Anger can make your stress worse.

We can worry so much about our own problems that we can’t see anything else. Step outside of your box and do something for some one else. Volunteering is a great way to give back to your community and it can bring satisfaction and peace

Get help if you need it. If you begin to feel overwhelmed and have suicidal thoughts, get help. Go to your minister, your spiritual center or mental health clinic and get help. Everyone gets discouraged from time to time but if those feelings become severe, get help.

Be a friend to yourself, don’t compare yourself to others, discover your talents, enjoy them and use them to help yourself and others so that you may become a more peaceful person. . For more information on the resources used for this topic visit the extension website at www.aces.edu.

Email address: aoutlaw@aces.edu
Phone: 937-7176 or 943-5611, 928-0860, ext. 2222

Issued in furtherance of Cooperative Extension work in agriculture and home economics, Acts of May 8 and June 30, 1914, and other related acts, in cooperation with the U.S. Department of Agriculture. The Alabama Cooperative Extension System (Alabama A&M University and Auburn University) offers educational programs, materials, and equal opportunity employment to all people without regard to race, color, national origin, religion, sex, age, veteran status, or disability.